Disfunctional

I've never thought this could happen. And I was standing there doing nothing, but let the flow flow...

Looking back, I start blaming this self... A hundred times still won't do. That was a big mistake. Sadly, it was too late to re correct. What have I done? wth have I been thinking? I'm now begging for self-forgiveness, in which I don't think I will ever be forgiven...

Wish I could be a lil more sensible at that particular moment. But, well, it's like the saying 'Only if you knew what you know now!' The truth is we would never ever gonna realize right or wrong till it's over.

I was disfunctional and that was a malfunction m3*~~!!!

NGY 09/10/29, @ 3:06 pm

The Other Side of the Door

'The Other Side of the Door' is one of the 6 new tracks from Taylor Swift for her Fearless album, Platinum Edition. And it fits so right with my mood tonight.

*~~ Here is my message for you: 'Have you had any ideas what was I really thinking when I slammed the door, didn't answer your SMS or call? Cannot you look at thing a lil closer?'

NGY 09/10/28, @ 3:02 am

The Unwanted Truth

I got to hear thing that I don't wish to hear, though I more than know it's the likely answer. You've never known how much I wish it's not. You were just being honest, I know but well, I'm just not good at taking the truth. Guess, the truth always is a pain. Then I felt like backing off, suddenly down and want to undo all the thing did and felt.

And there's just another thing that I know it's not right, however I have already partly contributed to what's today. Knowing this, and yet I allowed it to happen, blame it on m3*~~ for the fact that it's my bad.

Thing pretty much got messed up, guess I really need to take a long break from this unwanted truth!

NGY 09/10/25, @ 2:03 am

As You Wish

She's not given the right to be there... Knowing her place, she takes no more step though she so much wants to. She knows she possesses no where, she understands she doesn't belong... Well, 'unwanted' is the word!

You put up a wall that she dares not to take down. She know all the way to find you but she choose not to... That's just to grant your wish, if you wonder why.

From far behind, she is looking at how you on your own cope with thing. Worry and care are there, but, well, your action proves that you don't need and don't want the concern, so, yeah, she's holding back and and faking it as if she really doesn't care. She's acting as a true devil, a devil who is now crossing fingers praying all the goods for you.

*~~ Sorry for not being there for you!

NGY 09/10/24, @ 2:46 am

One 80

Say it
Prove it
You're just acting

Take it
Count it
I start believing

What is said
What is done
It's a 180 degree thing

Pretty much hurt
Pretty less care
Feel like falling to the ground

That's what I don't expect

It's not that you don't know
It's not that I don't forgive
It's not that you don't say sorry

It's a repeating mistake,
which I hate to forgive,
well, though I want to...

NGY 09/10/23, @ 00:50 am